Where have you gone, Dearly hogmanay?

Tonight I watched an episode of Turner Classic Movies' "Private Screenings" featuring former child actors Darryl Hickman, Jane Withers, Margaret O'Brien and Dick (formerly "Dickie" Moore). The four of them discussed their careers with host Robert Osborne.

The show included a plug for a book Hickman had written about creativity and acting.

The book seemed interesting, so I decided to look it up on the local library's online catalog. I wrote in Hickman's name and selected the category of "author."

There were four hits, all of them for movies Hickman had appeared in. No mention of his book.

But I mention this because, in giving me the results, the catalog asked me:

"Did you mean Dearly hogmanay?"

Never having heard of Mr. or Ms. hogmanay, I clicked on the name.

Turned out the library hadn't heard of him or her either.

So, you might ask, why did the Web site ask me if I meant Dearly hogmanay?

I dunno.

But one doesn't want to be rude, so I suppose I should respond the question. After all, the online catalog was only trying to be helpful.

Wasn't it?

Anyway.

Dear online catalog:

In response to your question:

I did not mean Dearly hogmanay.

I also did not mean Dearly Beloved.

Or Sadly Mistaken.

Or Snidely Whiplash.

Or High on the Hog.

Or Hi and Lois.

Or Green Eggs and Ham.

Very truly yours,

Markly Murphmanay